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Okay this one needs some explanation. I don’t want y’all to think I’m a weirdo or anything. As you should know, the past few weeks I have been posting a series of gift guides inspired by family and friends in my own life as part of the first annual  Sassafras Street Holiday Gift Guide Series. I decided I should probably mix it up and include a gift guide to help you shop for the men in your life, but the sad reality is I am only friends with girls and am seriously lacking in the boyfriend department. Reasonably I could’ve done a gift guide for my dad or brother, but no,  I made the ridiculous decision to create a gift guide for an imaginary boyfriend. Go ahead. Laugh at my silly life.

Meet my make-believe boyfriend: he is a tall brunette with a sincere smile and a good laugh. He’s outdoorsy; enjoys camping, fishing and hiking. But also appreciates fashion and culture and art. He has impeccable taste in music and shops almost exclusively at J.Crew. And coincidentally he resembles a J.Crew model as well! Imagine that! (I am currently accepting applications: all qualified applicants inquire here.)

My pretend boyfriend is basically the male equivalent of myself; if I were a man I would want all of the items on this list. And secretly I want some of them too! I love dresses and high heels and feminine details but there is something so effortlessly cool about the look of masculine pieces.

my imaginary boyfriend

1. Old Man and the Sea shirt from OutofPrintClothing.com. Hemingway is debatably one of the manliest authors in history; he was world class sports fisherman, big game hunter, boxer, bullfighting aficionado, war correspondent, and the list goes on.

2. It’s been a recent obsession of mine to become an expert in making cocktails. There has been a renaissance of classic cocktails with new ingredients in hipster bars across the country. I’m looking at you Craft and Commerce in San Diego. I would love a boyfriend that could moonlight as a bartender and teach me the tricks of the trade. American Bar is a guide for a well stocked bar, with recipes for classic American drinks and cocktails.

3. Decanters, martini shakers, snifters, oh my! What dude wouldn’t want a well-equipped bar with all the bells and whistles for their booze? Set from Pottery Barn

4. My imaginary boyfriend has a great vocabulary and likes to spend low-key nights in playing Scrabble with me. Clearly he needs this deluxe Scrabble set from Restoration Hardware (it’s on a lazy susan!!) so we can Scrabble in style.

5. Dear Chambray. Thank you for existing. You are my favorite fabric. You look fashionable on both men and women and are comfortable and easy to wear. I sincerely hope that you are not just a passing fad, I hope you will stay stylish for the rest of time.

6. I couldn’t resist. A leather flask? With a sassy little inscription? Stocking stuffer from J.Crew for my imaginary boyfriend (who is apparently kind of a booze hound?)

7. Beer from Stone Brewing Co. in San Diego. Again with the booze, I’m sorry.

8. Timex watch. Classic, not too flashy or pretentious. Just like my imaginary boyfriend.

9. Swiss Army Knife. A nice tool to have on hand for all the camping and fishing trips that my imaginary boyfriend and I go on. (side note: there are so many freaking models of swiss army knife, it is overwhelming, I spent a good 15 minutes looking for just your average swiss army knife on their website)

10. Leather I-phone case from Restoration Hardware.

11. Heaven knows I love me a shawl collar on a gentleman. Sweatshirt from J.Crew

12. Apple Pie Lightning from Rock Town Distillery “Arkansas’ first “legal” distillery since Prohibition” The website says “Grandaddy used to make a little lightning every now and then and mix it with apple juice and cinnamon to make it sippable.” Sounds like it’d make a festive seasonal drink for the holidays.

13. Messenger bag from J.Crew. Sturdy and stylish. I just might buy this one for myself to carry my books and laptop around campus.

14. Ultimate Book of Card Games from Restoration Hardware